As the lighthouse undergoes changes, so too do I. I began my forty-eighth year of teaching in September 2022 wondering how I could best utilize my experience, wisdom, and empathy with my freshmen who were still adjusting to in-person instruction after the isolation of Covid-19. Opportunities soon arose. I encouraged a foreign exchange student who experienced an unexpected medical emergency and hospitalization to continue her classes. Another student who’d suffered emotional issues in earlier semesters expressed, with a beatific smile, how she’d sought appropriate help and again felt confident. One ardent student, an older gentleman working as a paramedic, lost his partner to a drug overdose and was severely depressed. I contacted my college’s mental health department; he thanked me for caring and interceding for his welfare.
“I’m planning a trip to Spain,” a travel agent friend stated during the winter. “Interested?” Of course I was. A goal for 2023 was to increase my travel, including travel abroad. My sister and I flew to Spain at the end of August. I joined an on-line Spanish language learning class and was so intrigued each day that I studied at least two hours. While I was far from fluent by the time I traveled, the musicality of the Spanish language invited me to gain proficiency and to continue learning once I returned home. I enrolled in Beginning Spanish at a local college.
“How’s the pool at your condo?” a son asked as we dined. “We offer lessons at my park,” he stated. Two days later I stood in cool water as one of his best lifeguards instructed me.
“You got this,” Camilla encouraged. As I relaxed, she helped me trust myself. With her guidance, I did. At the end of the lessons, I sought out additional skills development and confidence. Angela, whose expertise with teaching adults matched her enthusiasm for doing so, enhanced my abilities and made swimming joyful.
In March 2023, I celebrated my seventieth birthday, surrounded by my children, my sister, and my love. Eric entered my life, quite unexpectedly and totally welcomed, during my move in 2021. We talk, laugh, enjoy, console, celebrate one another and take walks past the lighthouse. Our passion is amazing.
The lighthouse was completely renovated by Spring 2025. Both it and I exude strength, resilience, and enduring beauty.
Numerous photographs of twin grandsons born in 2024 are posted on my refrigerator door. One day soon, I’ll bring them to tour the lighthouse.
How can I be changed?
I can’t wait to discover what delights await.
What We Choose
There were moments
as a country we understood
like now
and looked away
from the shadow knife raised
on the wall
holding what feels like our collective breath
for better or for worse this is still
a democracy
we will get
what we choose
Valerie Mathews, 72, is a senior adjunct professor of English living in Tarrytown, NY. She belongs to writing and book groups, and frequents New York City. Among her many interests are swimming, yoga, theatre, studying Spanish, and expanding her travel abroad. She’s learning to play the banjo and endeavors to share her love for exploring new countries and customs with her delightful twin grandsons.
Margaret Karmazin’s credits include stories published in literary and SF magazines, among them Rosebud, Chrysalis Reader, Persimmon Tree, North Atlantic Review, Mobius, Confrontation, Pennsylvania Review, The Speculative Edge, Aphelion, AnotherRealm and The Rabbit Hole. Her stories in The MacGuffin, Eureka Literary Magazine, Licking River Review and Mobius were nominated for Pushcart awards.